# Codependency

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- Last updated: 2026-08-15
- Page title: Codependency | Assoc. Prof. Dr. Alişan Burak Yaşar

> You always know what they want. But what do you want? There is a commonly used term for losing your sense of self in a relationship: codependency. First, l

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# Codependency

June 3, 2026Recent Articles

You always know what they want. But what do you want? There is a commonly used term for losing your sense of self in a relationship: codependency.

First, let’s be clear: codependency is NOT a DSM diagnosis and remains a debated concept in the scientific literature. Nevertheless, it describes a measurable relationship pattern. The validated Composite Codependency Scale (Marks et al., 2012) groups this pattern into three dimensions: self-sacrifice (constantly putting your own needs aside), interpersonal control (the belief that "without me, everything would fall apart"), and emotional suppression.

Why does it matter? People with higher scores on this scale have been found to have higher levels of depression, anxiety, and stress, along with lower self-esteem and a reduced ability to express emotions. At the heart of this pattern often lies low "differentiation of self": a diminished capacity to maintain your own thoughts and feelings even within a close relationship (Chang, 2018).

The good news: this is not fixed; it is a skill you can learn. Five steps to reconnecting with yourself:
1) Recognize your needs by naming them
2) Start with small "noes"
3) Express your emotions rather than suppressing them
4) Rebuild a space of your own outside the relationship
5) Seek professional support if there are recurring patterns, trauma, or addiction

Treatment works: studies of cognitive behavioral therapy and family therapy show significant reductions in codependency. Remember — setting boundaries does not mean severing the bond.

Note: This content is for general information only and is not a substitute for an individual medical or psychological assessment.

[For scientific sources → CLICK HERE](https://alisanburak.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/06/EsBagimlilik_Carousel.pdf)

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